10 for a Counselor – Reason #1

I will be breaking down each of the ten reasons why you should find a counselor and heal your journey. I hope you enjoy and please join the conversation in the comments below. 

Reason #1 – Your friends are not being honest with you.

“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: “What! You too? I thought I was the only one.”
― C.S. Lewis

I have found this quote to be true. In my past, I have found a lot of friendships that stemmed from a common frustration with the western church. That is an easy commonality to talk about among most people nowadays. It is almost like saying, “I love sports, do you?” to a group of guys. For a long time, this is where the majority of my friends came from, a common frustration. This was an easy place to be, cynicism takes the pressure of off you being okay, because something else (the church, your family, your past) is broken.

In recent years, I had to decide that this was not good enough for me. I wanted to begin a path of healing and find friends based on what we were excited about it, instead of what we are against. Thankfully, many of my friends made the transition to this way of thinking (much longer before I).

I have found that when I became honest with myself, that I require others to be more honest with me. To be transparent, I do not like having to be honest with my friends. I don’t like calling them out. I would rather encourage them away from trouble, than just come right out and say it. Not being honest has caused me to lose some friendships, I should have been willing to be more honest, have more love for them. I was not honest, as deep within me resided a person who was very ashamed and hurt of my true feelings. I felt locked up. I had a lot to unload.

Counseling was helpful to me to find the reason behind my frustrations. My counselor helped me to find the real reason why I constantly was in need of finding a villain in my life. He helped me find that I was my own villain, keeping myself locked up in a emotional jail.

So now, I move forward, trying to be a better friend and be there when it counts, especially in those pivotal moments.

Discussion Questions:

  • How you treat your friends is a direct reflection of yourself. How do you treat your friends in regards to your honesty with them?
  • Do you feel like you require a villain in your life? What might be the cause of that?
  • What is keeping you from becoming a more peaceful person?
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